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This blog is for everyone interested in the Complaint-Free challenge. It's a place to share stories, hints, and other comments about the program.
A Complaint Free World's Fan Box
"If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude. Don't Complain."
-Maya Angelou
Click Below to Order Bracelets:
Order Braclets
"How Does it Work?
Scientists believe it takes 21 days to form a new habit and complaining is habitual for most of us. As Twain said, we must coax our old behavior down the stairs. The bracelet(s) you receive are a powerful tool(s) to remind you of how well you are creating your life with positive intention. Here are the suggested rules: 1. Begin to wear the bracelet, on either wrist
2. When you catch yourself complaining, gossiping or criticizing (it’s ok, everyone does) move the bracelet to the other arm and begin again.
3. If you hear someone else who is wearing a bracelet complain, you may point out their need to switch the bracelet to the other arm; BUT if you’re going to do this, you must move your bracelet first!
4. Stay with it. It may take many months but when you reach 21 days you will find that your entire life is happier, more loving, more positive and more abundant.
43 comments:
I think the most difficult part is having to deal with people at work. On-top of moving my bracelet when I complaing, I'm beginning to learn that I need to avoid certain people at times until I'm better able to face them without complaining
what a wonderful idea!
I am a Unity minister serving a small church on the West Coast. The most difficult part has been dealing with a member of our Board of Trustees. Their attitude is that this is not a positive activity ("Whoever started this has obviously not seen 'The Secret.' because they are saying what they don't want.")...change the bracelet again. The good news is that there are more people in our church participating and getting excited about what they are seeing happen in their lives as they become aware of their thinking. Several have given their bracelets away to others in our community and using substitutes until our next shipment arrives.
I first learned about the 21 days of no complaint when I heard Edwene Gaines speak few years ago. For me the process was so easy I kept it up now even if I think of complaint it is painful. I have not been physically ill for these years. I am almost debt free,(just the mortgage) spiritual teachers and lessons come as soon as I ask for them.
Wishing you all the very best of luck. It is very simple really, look for the blessings in every situation and respond with love.
Your miracles awaits.
i haven't received my bracelets yet, but ordered a dozen with the intention of sharing them with my family. I was telling co-workers today about the bracelet and they wished that i had placed the order for our store, only about 12 employees. so i came right home and placed another order, hopefully it will allow for a complaint free world at home and work, i'll keep you posted. it is truly a wonderful idea.
I'm a born New Yorker. kevetching is just part of our makeup. In fact thats what my blog is about, complainits. The question I have is if you don't complain about something how does the person that is annoying you going to know to fix their behavior or that there is even something wrong. And just for the record I am not critical merely observant also might need to make suggestions. As for Gossip I don't do it, but I don't mind listening. its like great Granny use to say" If you don't have anything nice to say come sit by me". LOL
I'm a born New Yorker. kevetching is just part of our makeup. In fact thats what my blog is about, complainits. The question I have is if you don't complain about something how does the person that is annoying you going to know to fix their behavior or that there is even something wrong. And just for the record I am not critical merely observant also might need to make suggestions. As for Gossip I don't do it, but I don't mind listening. its like great Granny use to say" If you don't have anything nice to say come sit by me". LOL
im a 17 year old and i just got half way through watching the Oprah show and i jumped up quick and ran up stairs to my computer to order some...not only does my family need this but im also going to go to my church with this...this is a great idea and i think my church will love it!
thanks!
This is truly a wonderful idea, can't wait to share with my friends and family.
I pray that I will be able to make the 21 days and be an inspiration to those around me....
God Bless!
My son and I found one of your bracelets laying in a parking lot in Olathe. I was intrigued but had not taken the time to look up your web site. I washed the bracelet up and put it aside, thinking it would be something my grandson could play with.
This evening I was talking to a neighbor and she started telling me about a segment on Oprah about a "movement" started by a church minister to stop complaining for 21 days. She was able to give me some details on the story and I came home and looked up the site. What a wonderful idea, my 12 year old son and I both plan to start tonight. He's going to wear the bracelet we found and I will wear a similar bracelet, without the words, but with the same intention. I'm sure it will be tough as I'm a frequent complainer(about what doesn't get done at home while I'm working, what isn't available to do my job while I'm at work, on and on). I don't think the complaints are petty, but neither are they helpful. How much more proactive will I be when I am stifling complaints or finding more helpful ways of expressing myself? I can't wait to find out! Thank you for a wonderful idea.
While I must tell you that I completely disagree with the flawed theology statements found on the church website. However, I do agree with the principle of "no complaints" The Scriptures do teach us to be thankful in all circumstances for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for believers. Also to find what is praise worthy in everyday living and offer praise. I would admonish & encourage every reader to not confuse speaking the truth in love with complaining. Taken to the extreme some might conclude that speaking against sin & for the righteousness of God in Christ might be label complaining against immorality and evil.
j
Alright, I am on my first day of the challange and I have to say this is quite the challange (but I say that in the most positive way becuase I am up for it). I even got a few of my co-workers to take the challange with me. I don't think they know how serious I really am. I really think that this will teach me not to complain about the things that are out of my control. I am really beginning to listen to my inner dialogue and think before I speak. Such a great lesson...I will report back in a couple of days.
Alright, I am on my first day of the challange and I have to say this is quite the challange (but I say that in the most positive way becuase I am up for it). I even got a few of my co-workers to take the challange with me. I don't think they know how serious I really am. I really think that this will teach me not to complain about the things that are out of my control. I am really beginning to listen to my inner dialogue and think before I speak. Such a great lesson...I will report back in a couple of days.
This will prove to be very interesting. I figured, why wait for the bracelet? That would waste 3-5 weeks, so while I am waiting I am still attempting to succeed at the idea of not complaining. I decided that 15 minutes in to my work day, I would have worn the bracelet out IF it included internal thoughts. Of course I am sure it does include them otherwise everyone would internalize and in the end implode. :)
Then I thought ok, so the problem is not ME it is the people that I am in contact with everyday that are chronic complainers. How the heck can I fix that? And then I slapped myself upside the head knowing that the change still has to come from me because I cannot change others.
This is going to be tough...OR...I am going to implode :)
I think this is a great idea,I can see the change in people who already ordered the bracelet. I wish this came sooner but I guess God had a different plan.
God Bless,
A litle Geogian girl
I just ordered thebraclets, however, I am so excited about this idea that I am starting without it. I know it will be a challenge for me because i do complain.......alot. Work will be a challenge as will driving and heck, even getting out of bed in the morning. lol. Cant wait!! Thanks and good luck fellow non complainers!
I just ordered my complaint free bracelet. I am so ready to become a better person by not complaining. One of my best friends, Jessica, was watching Oprah and saw the episode including The Complaint Free World. So we decided to start becoming complaint free together. I'm stoked :]
I was home from work with a family crisis and had Oprah on in the other room. I heard the segment on complaining and "tuned in." With tears rolling down my face, I heard the words of the pastor...and knew he was talking to me. There are so many things in our lives that are harsh and unbearable, but changeable...and complaining does nothing but fuel the negativity! As a mother of three, one of my most important sayings was that I never allowed my children to say the words, "It's not fair!" Because, life is not fair...but you get out of it what you put in! I am excited to receive my bracelets, but am already implementing the no complaint policy in my daily life! Thank you for the inspriration!
When I watched the Oprah show with my mom I jumped up and ran to get my bracelet to start. Then it dawned on me- I had enough bracelets for everyone in my 5th grade class! Since I couldn't wait 5 weeks to get your bracelets my class has been using mine. Everyone thinks it's a great idea but a challenging one! Thanks for solving a big classroom problem for me!
well i have recently been inspired by this challenge and have successfully encouraged others to join me...although i have some time to wait for the bracelettes, we are actively talking about it and consciously attempting to sort when, how, and where we are complaining...we still seem to be struggling with what constitutes a complaint which makes me believe that we must be in some kind of denial. When we started to sort our complaints we are feeling most of our reactions are complaining about everything now...is this a sign of change or are we being to analytical about it. Either way being more aware does make us catch ourselves and relieves the usual stressful feelings we get when we used to complain and empowers us to find alternative ways to deal with things we do not like or cant control.
Right now My biggest struggle with no complaining is that I am physicaly sick. I have a bad cold and Ive been complaining about it and switching my bracelet constantly. I finnaly got one day in though!
I love doing this but my biggest challange so far is being sick. i am finding myslef complaining alot about it and I have to start over. But my complaining is getting less. This is a hard thing to do when you have a bad cold or something but so far I made it one day
Dear Christ Church Unity,
I am sending you a donation for $18.00 for my Complaint Free World bracelet. I am Jewish and in the Jewish religion, Chet is the eighteenth letter of the alphabet. Chai means life in Hebrew and it begins with the letter Chet. For happy occasions, many donations in the Jewish faith are made in increments of eighteen.
Reverend Bowen, I love your idea. I am a firm believer in this concept and I think you are already making a HUGE difference in this world.
Thank you!
Actually, Chai (the word for life) has a numerical value of eighteen. Chet is the eighth letter.
Can you please make sure that this is corrected? And on the blogs I posted as well.
THANKS!!
I haven't ordered mine yet, but I'm going to real soon. I've been telling all my friends about it and collecting "orders" from them, and so far, I'm at 35! As soon as they have all told me what they want, I'm going to order. I can't wait until they come, it's going to be fun, but hard. I think that I didn't realize how much people (including me) complain until I saw these bracelets and thought about it. I think that these are a great idea, thanks so much!
I haven't ordered mine yet, but I'm going to real soon. I've been telling all my friends about it and collecting "orders" from them, and so far, I'm at 35! As soon as they have all told me what they want, I'm going to order. I can't wait until they come, it's going to be fun, but hard. I think that I didn't realize how much people (including me) complain until I saw these bracelets and thought about it. I think that these are a great idea, thanks so much!
Hi, I just ordered a bunch for my church. Even without a bracelet, I've been trying to apply what I learned from Oprah to my daily life, although now it will be much easier.
I think this is a step in the right direction.
Thanks, Lis
I have not received my braclets yet but I am anxiously awaiting...Thank you for such a wonderful, positive idea.
I finally got my bracelet and am wearing it today for the first time. My struggle ahs been to start by internalizing any complaints I might have, then to look for the positive intentions behind what ever I would ahve complained about.
So far my biggest helphas been the FISH philosophy, esp the part of it about choosing your atitude, if I find myself getting to a point of complaining I stop and remind myself "I choose to be positive" It's already become my mantra
I have not received my bracelets yet, but I have tried to impliment the "No Complaining" before hand. It is hard being an Army Wife who just found out her husband will be deploying to Iraq for his second tour after being home for 15 months. He will be gone for an extended tour and I am trying hard not to complain. We are parents of 2 small children. I am going to pass these bracets out to other Army Wife, as a reminder that our husbands do this work without complaining. MY HUBBY IS MY ROLE MODEL!! WISH ME LUCK :-)
I live in Bombay India. I frequently listen to your Christ Church Unity Archive and so appreciate it. I have just started trying out the complaint free bracelet but my 16 year old daughter questioned it. We find discontent a great thing to let go but what about true grief and pain isn't there a place for that in our lives rather than just negating it?
Agnes in India
I look forward to receiving my bracelet order and to work hard on changing my life and becoming complaint free, as I should have been before. Thanks for bringing it to my attention as something I need to do now!
I love the idea of making people more aware of how they can become embedded in habits without being aware of it and a useful and effective method in which to change those ingrained habits.
To live in awareness and to consciously choose to celebrate and praise God’s creation is a wonderful and useful gift to the world, especially in this country. However, because habits can become habits, it would be easy to make people believe that if you complain, it is a negative or not living in an empowered and spiritual way.
With the world being at war and with so many injustices that need to be worked on - it is important that the idea of "not complaining" be kept in context and in balance - and not adopted as a method unto itself.
Change for the greater good often comes when people say, “enough is enough” whether it is with the Vietnam war, Don Imus or Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD).
There are dangers in everything, the last thing we need are Stepford wives, husband and children who are afraid to speak truth to power - thinking it is just complaining.
Jesus did not live a complaint free life - he was upset and expressed negative emotions over the injustices that he witnessed. Mosses destroyed the ten commandments when he got upset over the behavior of his people.
All I am saying is, keep it in balance and context to your life and the world in which we live.
Bracelets were passed out at our church (Unity Houston) last Sunday. I have some questions, like, "If you think of complaining, but don't say it, do you start over?" Is there a web site that deals with this kind of nuance?
Thanks, Barry
I have not received my bracelet yet but I am looking forward to the challenge. My coach thinks I complain a lot. I am a senior age triathlete. I think he would like me to either do the training or not but not complaiin about it. I didn't think I was a complainer, just expressing my concerns. Apparently it doesn't look that way to others. So I am going to try to change.
Also I believe that comploaining is contagious. If you hear it a lot, you tend to join in. I hope to stop complaining so as to influence others to stop complaining also. I don't like to hear it either.
This is my first day wearing this bracelet. This is an amazing idea! I had to switch it to my other wrist within 1 min. and that was a real eye opening to me about how much I really do complain. I'm working at a kids camp this summer and thought that this would be really cool to give the kids. I'm very thankful for Christ Church Unity. You're all amazing! Thanks for coming up with a solution for our bad habit.
In Christ,
~HannahS~
I am still waitng for the braclets that I ordered and am excited to begin. In reading the comments other bloggers have made it has struck me that there is concern that by doing away with complaining we will not be able to express ourselves fully. There is a place for complaints and yes, Jesus did complain. I think what this program is aimed at helping to fix is the "Habit of Complaining" without action. This negativity can be destructive. Wearing and using the Complaint Free bracelet brings your thoughts to your consciousness and makes you aware of own thinking. It allows you to break out of that negative cycle by empowering you with consciousness and awareness.
I order my bracelet and I can wait to show it to everyone to see if people do the same
This is wonderful. I've spent the last three days telling blogstabbers who rant about their lovers, teachers, bosses to simply shut up. I'm glad they have a more constructive site to turn to. I will let everyone know about it.
To me the hardest challenge was criticizing others. I would just say things to people in a very negative way. Now instead of me saying "You are always messing things up!" I will say "Why don't you try again but with a different approach." My friends and family have noticed my improvement and so did I.
I received my bracelets last night and have already switched three times. I'm sure there would have been much more complaining had I not had the bracelet so already I can see it has forced me to think about my actions and reactions.
I am passing the others bracelets onto family and co-workers. I can't make them change their behavior, I can only give them the tool to start the job themselves.
Thanks for giving me the chance to make a positive change in my life.
I received my bracelet yesterday but am all of a sudden having a serious problem. What is a complaint REALLY?
Shortly after I put it on, I was whining about the heat and switched my bracelet from one wrist to the other. But later that day I didn't want to get on a plane and said so to my dad. He reminded me of my commitment to not complain and I switched the bracelet again. But I wonder... can we express what we do and do not want without it being considered a complaint? Is it in the way we say it? I can say "I don't want to get on this plane" in two different ways, one will sound like a whiny complaint and another way can sound like a statement of fact.
I had to say goodbye to one of my best friends who lives a thousand miles away from me and I just kept thinking, "I wish she didn't live so far away." This is an expression of how I feel. It can be construed as a complaint, but I don't mean to be negative. It comes from a place of love. I wish I were geographically closer to her but I sincerely value the time we do get to spend together.
I consider myself a positive person in general and appreciate the bracelet as a reminder to stay positive and focus on the good in every situation. But there are bound to be times when my feelings or my opinions are not going to agree with the circumstance or situation I find myself in and biting my tongue instead of expressing my feelings doesn't feel right to me either.
Any comments on the definition of complaint are welcome!
i'm going through a really tough time at work right now. my supervisor is trying everything in her power to make me so miserable i'll quit while she works on firing me. unfortunately for her, i have the director and ADA on my side. this bracelet is forcing me to see the good in the struggle and while i am switching wrists a lot after she says something hurtful, i feel myself getting stronger and her words not hurting as much. it has gotten so much easier to ignore the little things i used to complain about so i am sure that soon, even this big thing will roll off my back. thanks for helping me to remember that there is good in everyone and everything. sometimes i think i forget.
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